Well spoken Jeff <3

Posted by: @jeffrey

Hi,

I registered onto this site about 2 years ago and since my fervent obsession with mewing and trying to improve my face two years ago, I only really just remembered about this site and came back to have a look.

I am going to share a personal view of mine and I want to hear what your opinions are. So:

Don't get me wrong, but I have felt way happier in comparison to when I was fixated on trying to change my face two years ago. With things such as trying to lift my tongue up correctly and worrying what specific parts of my face are "unfavourable" and how they could be improved with different contraptions having had been on my mind for two months years ago, they have not been on my mind since. Because the thing is, this notion of trying to constantly improve oneself to looking their best, I feel, can actually be extremely harmful, even toxic, by awakening insecurities and overtaking one's consciousness as they scrutinise every part of their face for every waking moment of the day. For me, back then, it felt that my face was inherently inferior when I was born or that who I was, based on how I looked, was that of a second-rate person compared to supermodels in magazines and clothes advertising. 

True, that my face may not be as beautiful as theirs, but this discussion on aesthetics and one's face by communities online and across the world causes a dangerous emphasis on one's exterior and not on other aspects of oneself. Yes, studies have shown being more attractive can yield benefits compared to being more mediocre looking. But, personally, I feel that time spent consciously focusing on how to look your best could be spent to improving one's interior, that is, their personality, by seeking experiences and fully being present in the moment to enjoy life and to not be distracted (which itself lowers the quality of living by not being in the present), and their skill set. Improving aspects other than appearance would perhaps even override these biases to more beautiful people.

It's great that this forum is much less toxic than some of the "looksmax" forums online, so I do not mean to malign this forum in particular, but my message to those who feel incredibly obsessed with the inadequacy of their face, is that you are enough. You don't need to undergo these facial corrections to be a better person, because people who truly value you will do so because of your integrity and personality, and the people in your life that appear when it matters, when it counts, are there because they appreciate these two things about you; not your looks.

I don't mean to be hypocritical as some of you may have noticed I have recently posted a thread about my situation and whether I can improve my looks, but given how the past two years have been where I haven't really thought of mewing, it felt like a weight had been lifted. I realised I didn't need to be attractive to do the things I wanted, to be where I wanted to be, and to be happy.

Whilst trying to improve your appearance is a choice I respect, I just would like to remind that many people in this world, the people who will truly value you as a person, will not care about how you look and that again, you are enough. If it is a thing you're curious about or something you do as a side to your everyday life, and as long as it does not encroach or impact other parts of your life negatively, it is great. However, if it becomes harmful, please remember these words as there are many people in your life who love you for who you are and not what you look like.

Peace :)

very true all through mewing has a placebo effect which in my case was very positive I am much more positive about myself and my looks then in the past

Posted by: @mr-mewing

Posted by: @jeffrey

Hi,

I registered onto this site about 2 years ago and since my fervent obsession with mewing and trying to improve my face two years ago, I only really just remembered about this site and came back to have a look...

very true all through mewing has a placebo effect which in my case was very positive I am much more positive about myself and my looks then in the past

It is placebo?! I have been wondering all this time whether it has scientific evidence to back it up or whether it was placebos. I am glad it worked out well for you :)

@jeffrey

Yeah, I suppose. Personally I know to do this stuff as more of something on the sideline, rather than my only focus in life.

I agree completely. I used to feel resentful about the fact that my face hasn't developed in a healthy and aesthetic manner. After noticing what negative effect it had on my mental health, I stopped caring about the whole effort briefly. Now I see that that too was the wrong approach: caring too much about your appearance is bad, but disregarding it is bad also. I now try to be more Stoic about the whole process, and my approach could be summarized like this: "I will try to do what I can to improve my CFD for both, appearance and health, BUT, I won't stress about the results, or become indignant if I don't achieve as much progress as I'd like. In other words, I will work towards bettering my life, but at the same, I will be happy with the lot that I'm given." It's a balancing act.

Moderation is the key, one can mew, run, exercise, meditate, etc, actually meditating while mewing is a wonderful thing, to my mind.

My two cents.

P.S.

placebo?, You might get a placebo effect at the begging, however, when one's head starts popping and vibrating while mewing , then it is not a placebo any longer......It's REAL..... IMHO and experience.